Ways to tell if you have "That" Friend

The topic of having and what makes someone a good friend has been on my mind a lot this week.  This year has been great for me in terms of making really good friends, but there were times when I wasn't as lucky.  I'm sure we can all admit that we haven't always been the perfect friend to the people we love, and the people we love haven't been the perfect friends to us.  However, there are some friends..."THAT" friend, who isn't necessarily the nicest or most considerate person in our clique on a more consistent basis.  But if you're still unclear as to the kind of person I'm talking about, I've composed a list of hints that will help you spot if you have or maybe even are "that" friend (although I sincerely hope that you have a fun, loyal, honest, trustworthy group of friends in which this post would just be for entertainment).

Do you have friends like this, or the ones below?  (Source)

They only text you when they need something - And to them, that means "anything" at any time of the day.  

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They talk about themselves...ALL the time - Friends are supposed to make sacrifices, and your friend believes that means you sacrificing your own problems to listen to theirs.

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They lie to you when you ask for their advice or opinions because why would you deserve to hear their actual opinions?  They like to agree with you no matter what, in order to avoid arguments and any of the sticky stuff that comes with having an honest conversation.

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When you just know your friend is lying (Source)

They talk about you behind your back to, well, anyone - Yes, your friend loves you most of the time, but sometimes they can't help but vent to other people when you're getting on his/her last nerve!

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They don't make conversation with your family - Even though your parents are the ones who drove the two of you to the Jonas Brothers' concert in '07, or let him/her sleep in your house for three days straight, your friend doesn't feel the need to be all buddy-buddy with your fam.  They have one family they have to speak to on a daily basis, and that's enough for them.  

Source

They never offer to pay the extra couple of dollars for you- It sucks when you're missing some change to pay for your Booster Juice smoothie, but it's really not their problem now is it?

When "that" friend gives you the "you're broke" look... (Source)

They drop you as soon the people around them make fun of you- "You are only as good as the company you keep" and your friend doesn't want to be associated with someone who makes them look bad in the eyes of people he/she doesn't even care about.  

Source

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If they ever have a choice between their significant other and you, they always choose the significant other - They don't think blowing you off to be with their boyfriend or girlfriend is that big of a deal.  You should understand that the person they've been dating for two weeks means A LOT to them, ok???

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They always make excuses when they can't hang out with you - Sometimes your friend gets better offers, and he/she needs to think of a little white lie to get out of spending yet another Friday night eating pizza and watching Sex and the City reruns with you. 

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They point out your flaws or state their opinions...especially when it's most inappropriate - Their idea of being a good friend means telling you when you're "getting fat", don't have the right personality for your dream job, or that your boyfriend dresses weird.  And they believe it's best when these things are said in front of a large group of people. 

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They flirt with your crush/boyfriend/girlfriend/ex, but that's only to test your crush/boyfriend/girlfriend/ex to make sure they were, are, or will be a good and loyal candidate for you.  Well...most of the time.  On other occasions, it's just to annoy you.  Oops!

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They don't let you have other friends - You only need one person in your life, and that's obviously him/her.  Any other platonic relationships would just get in the way of the strong bond you two share.

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They write rude statuses and tweets about you when they're angry - It makes more sense for him/her to share their anger at you with the cyber world than directly with you.  That way, tension can build between you, people can gossip about your friendship, and the whole situation can become bigger than it could have been if they had just spoken to you directly.

Scrolling down your timeline happily until you see that awful subtweet (Source)

They don't do anything with you unless they want to do it - Remember the "sacrifice" we spoke about earlier?  Well that only applies to you.  Therefore, your friend should never be asked to sit through a boring sports game, or spend six hours at the mall shopping for something that you're clearly not going to find.  

Well... (Source)

They say one thing, and do the other - On Tuesday, your friend tells you that he/she hates when people do something, and on Friday, you catch them doing the exact thing they said they hated.  But they can't help it...he/she is a complex person.

Cut it out. (Source)

I'm sure there are other ways to tell if you have "that" friend, but these are the main characteristics that no one ever wants in a friend.  As I said above, none of us are perfect, but I can honestly say that I've had friends say and do some of these things, and it feels good when those people are personally escorted out of my life.  So, if you spot any of these in some of your present friends, I recommend assessing whether "that" friend adds value to your life (in which you sit down with him/her and let them know how you feel), or whether they simply add stress (in which you do not neeeeeeeed them).  However, if you see these characteristics in yourself (myself included), we also need to be mindful of how we are treating the people who are most important our lives.  Because, quite frankly, we all deserve to have amazing friends...but to also be amazing friends as well. 

One of my favourite sayings is "relationships shouldn't be stressful", and they shouldn't!  Your friends should bring out the absolute best in you, and you should bring out the best in them!

xx

Check out my Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest, and share this post if you liked it.  Have an amazing week!

Weekly Friday Favs - Social Media Edition

1. Favourite Tweet

Definitely my favourite tweet this week!

I love how accurate this tweet is.  As much as some may try to deny it, the majority of us try to post our Instagram pictures during a time where the most people will see and click the "like" button.  Nothing's worse than posting a really good selfie and getting fewer likes simply because of bad timing. HA.

2. Favourite Instagram - TASTETORONTO

How delicious does all this food look?? Follow Taste Toronto for more!

This instagram account is beauty and torture at the same time.  Tastetoronto posts pictures of meals from "restaurants, markets and street corners" in Toronto, and I am being 100% honest when I say I would try every single thing on this collective menu of Toronto's best eats.  Your stomach will grumble and salivation might occur, but I doubt you'll be able to stop scrolling because every meal is perfection.

3. Favourite Vine - Tasia Alexis

If you haven't already, download Vine for the funniest and most random looping videos from normal people! (Run your mouse over the video and click on the speaker for sound)

Vine is definitely one of my favourite apps because it makes me feel good knowing I'm not the only one who thinks, feels, or says certain things (the only difference is that these Vine users are extremely creative and super funny!).  Although this hasn't happened to me, TasiaAlexis is definitely showing one of my struggles of never having friends over.

4. Favourite Youtube Video - Joey Graceffa 

I love this video!  Watch it here.

British Youtube Star SprinkleOfGlitter joins JoeyGraceffa in a short but hilarious game of Would You Rather.  Sooo funny (not to mention Joey dying of laughter the entire time)!!!

5. Favourite Pin

No explanation needed.  Let this be all of our mottos for 2014!

What are your favourite posts from the social media realm this week?  

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest.  Have an excellent week!

~

7 Songs We Probably Shouldn't Have Known the Lyrics to as Children

Do you remember sitting in your car seat at the back of your family's vehicle singing about money, cars, and women?  Your parents laughing and thinking it was so cute that you know all the lyrics to a song on the radio?  I know I do.  And, it probably was cute because we probably had no clue what we were talking about.  And that's a good thing.  But now that we're all grown up (I'm 18 now), when we search for an older song we loved, and read the lyrics, it's clear we may have been just a tad corrupted during those car rides.  It was all harmless and songs are generally really good, but below are a few (clean versions--search up the dirty versions if you so choose to!) that most of us can admit to knowing a bit too much of the words, even if we didn't know their true meanings at the time.

1. It Wasn't Me - Shaggy (2001)

Lucky for you, here is the video with all the lovely lyrics.

I know you know it.  Every single one of you.  You were screaming "IT WASN'T ME", but did you really know what you were denying?  I mean, at the time, it was just a catchy song with a beat you could groove to in your booster seat.  In reality, it's about this guy explaining how his girlfriend caught him "creeping" with the girl next door in...many different places around the house, and Shaggy telling him to say it wasn't him.  Most of us are still unclear about what Shaggy is saying on the track, but the chorus was definitely loud and clear.

2. Ride Wit Me - Nelly (2001)

Watch the official Ride Wit Me video.

Watch this video to hear what I'm talking about!

Along with It Wasn't Me, Ride Wit Me was one of my favourite songs growing up.  I must admit, I didn't reaaally know all the lyrics (and I still don't), but I added this because on the radio, the clean version does this cool inhale and outhale sound that I really enjoyed and would often imitate.  It was a few years later, however, that I realized that those sounds symbolized...well...smoking questionable substances.  Ooops.

3. Mesmerize - Ja Rule ft. Ashanti (2002)

Watch the Mesmerize music video here.

I actually like this song.  Ashanti's sweet R&B voice complements the roughness of Ja Rule's, and it is kind of romantic--Ja and Ashanti confessing what they love about each other--but any song with the word "fetish" in the lyrics may not be the best in molding the minds of young ones.  Not to mention singing "love it when you kiss me baaaaaby" when the only ones kissing us at the time were our parents.

4. In Da Club - 50 Cent (2003)

Watch In Da Club here.

Although this song was remixed by Beyoncé and other artists later on, the original 50 Cent version of In Da Club still takes the cake--possibly because I was just so "hood" as a kid.  Once the intro started, I was ready to belt "GO GO GO GO SHAWTY, IT'S YA BIRTHDAY.....AND WE GONNA SIP A CARDY (Bacardi)......My mom was probably glad that I only had a general idea of the lyrics, while I merely loved that this song made me feel so much cooler than I actually was.

5. Get Low - Lil Jon and the East Side Boyz ft. the Ying Yang Twins (2003)

Watch Lil Jon and The East Side Boyz's video here.

Watch Sandra Bullock's "remix" of Get Low here. Ha!

I'm sure we can all identify with Sandra Bullock's dancing to it in The Proposal, because it's kind of what most of us look like when we start singing "To the windooooooww to the wall, to the wall!  Till the sweat drops down my"--wait what?  Okay, maybe the lyrics aren't particularly inspiring, but it can definitely get a party started.

6.  Candy Shop - 50 Cent ft Olivia (2005)

He'll take you to the, er, "candy shop".  Watch here.

50 Cent returns two years later with this track, and my my my.  Candy and lollipops sound good until, well, the rest of the song.  Because how do candy shops even fit in with the rest of the lyrics...?  I'll let you figure it out.

7. Beep - The Pussycat Dolls ft Will.I.Am (2006)

I love the Beep music video just as much as the song itself!

Okay, it's 2006, and we're a little bit older now.  Old enough for this song to grace our ears and stimulate our brains.  This modern burlesque, dance-pop group had fun with radio censors by playing musical beeping sounds, or laughing whenever it seemed like an appropriate word would be sung.  It's actually really clever and the song is girly and fun, not to mention the girls were getting it with their dance moves in the music video above.  But now that we're truly old enough, I'm sure it's a little easier to "ad-lib", and guess which words would be in place of the entertaining beeps.

There are a ton of other songs most of us sang while growing up that take on a whole different meaning now, but ignorance is bliss, and the kids turned out alright (for the most part)!  But these are some of the best received songs by critics and audiences because of their memorable and risque lyrics, as well as tunes and beats we will always recognize when the radio or DJ throws them back.

What songs did you know all the words to growing up?  And an even bigger question: as songs get even more explicit, sexual, and inappropriate, in 10 years, will you play these types of songs in your car, and laugh while your children harmlessly get all the words wrong (or surprisingly right), or change the station in search for more kid-friendly lyrics?


Don't forget to check me out on Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest.  Enjoy the rest of your week!

~

New Year, New Me?

Can someone please find me one person who has stuck with their New Year's resolutions this year...or any year?  Because as far as I'm concerned, a list of 10 things I should (or shouldn't) do for 365 days is really just tiring, stressful, and often unrealistic.  I mean, resolutions like "Stop eating Mcdonald's forever" and "Exercise every single day" are just not going to happen for a a girl like me who loves salty french fries and laying in bed for hours.

But your resolutions don't have to be all talk and no action.  If you write them down somewhere visible, create timelines, and are truly committed to making a change even when things get tough, there is no reason why you can't make this upcoming year the best one yet.

I have come up with a few tips on how to succeed (or at least try) in achieving your New Year's resolutions.

1. Come up with a shorter list

Think carefully when you write your resolutions.  See this photo here.  

I'm sure there are hundreds of things we could all do in order to become perfect people, but it's just not realistic.  Try thinking of 3-5 improvements you would like to make in your life.  That way, you can stay focused on the driving forces of your decisions and changes.  Even one goal is a big step.

2. Put your list in plain sight

Adding little notes on the to the fridge, TV, or even a bag of chips creates a visual that may help you to refrain from bad habits.

As much as I hate to admit it (I rarely write things down...ironic huh?), creating a fun, colourful list on paper, and placing it somewhere you visit everyday can be very motivating, and put you in the right mind-frame for the day. You can even write little notes on significant items to remind you of your goals.

3. Partner up with someone

Teaming up with friends to accomplish mutual goals is always a win-win.  
Find this photo and some fun partner workouts here!

Working on your resolutions with a friend, family member, or even a co-worker can also be a great motivator.  When one of you feel like giving up, you can push each other to keep going.  Not to mention reaping in the rewards together!

4. Don't be afraid of failure or setbacks 

Success can still be achieved after a perceived "failure"...Don't give up!  Photo from here.

Remember that a NY Resolution should be a personal choice; no one should be forcing you to do anything.  During the course of the year, don't be beat yourself up about eating that extra slice of pizza--you're not perfect!  Just be proud of how far you've come, and resume your efforts as soon as you can.

5. Be ready to make the commitment and stay disciplined

What a great quote!  Something we should all think about.  See this photo here.

Although you shouldn't be afraid to fail, make sure to take your resolutions seriously.  Without being committed and truly depriving yourself of indulgences from the previous year, you are bound to quit before next December.  That is why it is important to set goals that you are willing to "suffer" to achieve...and stick with them.

6. Download an App to keep you on track

Evernote is an effective way to keep your life organized and remember everything.  

The Nike Training Club app lets you choose workouts based on your 
personal goals, track your progress, and set your own music while getting in shape!

For 99 cents, iMood Journal is simple and cute, and helps you track what
makes you happy and upset. Rate your mood and add comments on why you're feeling that way.

Since most of us have our cell phones in hand or 2 millimeters away 99% of the time, why not put that to use for your New Year's goals?  There are apps for specific purposes (e.g. quitting smoking, losing weight, or exercising), and some just to keep your thoughts organized.  A few apps I really love are Evernote, Nike Training Club, and iMoodJournal to chart how I feel about my progress!

My New Year's Resolutions:

• Read the bible more often
• Take advantage of my school's gym (I'm paying for it anyway!)
• Get a part-time or full-time summer job that is relevant to my future career
• Respond to text messages quicker 
• Post to this blog regularly and consistently!

It is going to be tough, but when those hard times occur, keep thinking of how great you'll feel when the year is up, and the biggest reward you'll receive: a better you!

What are your resolutions for the new year?

Don't forget to follow me on Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest.  Have a wonderful new year and good luck with your goals and resolutions!

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