This week I was reading through past journal entries, and came across a list I made at the beginning of the year, entitled "Things I would have told my 'then' self". I think we all have valuable tips we would have given ourselves if only we knew how life would pan out, but sadly, the past is in the past. Nevertheless, I thought it'd be fun to share my list with you, because although I have no regrets, maybe people still in high school can benefit from my lessons, or people my age and older can identify with these tips/warnings drawn from different experiences I've had so far.
Today's blog post is comes straight from my journal people!
1. Do not lose your tattoo choker because those things are now going for way more than you'll be willing to pay.
2. Remember people's last names so you can creep them on Facebook seven years later and see what they look like post-puberty.
3. You're not popular. You don't even know what that means. Stop being stuck up. You're 10.
4. Cherish all the field trips you're going on because it will never happen again.
5. Don't be friends with mean people who make you feel the need to be meaner yourself.
6. The people you try so hard to impress and be friends with actually suck. STAY AWAY.
7. But don't stay away because they will teach you that there is no need to impress and be friends with people who suck. Ha.
8. Not everyone will like you or understand you. Some will hate you for no reason but that's ok, own it.
9. You can't save everyone, and sometimes, you can't save people from themselves.
10. Maybe don't cry so much over people, because I promise you none of them will be remotely relevant today.
11. Care more about people's feelings.
12. But always do what's best for you regardless of what other people think.
13. University is as good as they say, and better than you think it will be.
14. Things get better.
15. Remember that happiness is a choice.
16. Time really does heal all.
This was just a short post, but it's always interesting to reflect on past experiences and realize that when people used to say "those things you're worrying about won't matter in a few years" they were 100% right! I would love to know what you would have told your "then" self based on what you've learned about yourself and life in general, so don't be afraid to comment or tweet me!
Ahh, it has been way too long. The last time I wrote a post for this blog, it was the beginning of the school year, and now it's almost July!
I've been away for so long because I've been trying to figure out what kind of content I want to post, based on what I really enjoy, and what I want to share with people. My previous posts have been "Buzzfeed-esque", which were fun to write, but lately, I've been realizing how passionate I am about different issues, and that I shouldn't be afraid to discuss my opinions or share a deeper and more insightful side of me.
I am the first to admit that I am a very...scared person. I'm a perfectionist, so many times I am fearful that my efforts to do something different won't be taken the way I want, or that I'll fail. But failure only occurs when you don't even bother trying. SO I need to force myself to stop thinking so much, and do what I want. Because that's when I'll see results. That's when I'll be more successful--even if I fail. If that makes sense.
I literally need to read this every day of my life.
But anyway, the first issue that I want to tackle, is that of the "real" woman. I wrote a previous post on the concept of "beauty" as a whole (check it out here), but this one is geared more toward my ladies, and the obsession society seems to have with our bodies.
I've always been pretty comfortable with my body, even though the people around me may not have felt the same way about how I looked. I grew up, especially in high school, being called "skinny". And I don't mean the "Wow, you're so skinny and beautiful". No, the word "skinny" often shot out of people's mouths like venom; it was a distasteful, ugly word, and without a doubt, an insult. This is because people (both men and women) have this notion that women have to have a certain body, certain attributes that fit their idea of beautiful. Because "only real women have curves", or "why have a skinny girl when you can have a girl with a real body?". Excuse me, what????
Everyone has their preferences when it comes to what they find attractive, but there doesn't have to be an either or. We were all created without error, and if that means that some of us are on one end of the spectrum, some of us are on the other end, and some are sitting in the middle, that doesn't make any of us less of a woman, or less beautiful, capable, interesting, or amazing than the next. We are all trying to navigate through life the best way we can, and don't need the added stress of trying to live up to the (impossible) expectations of people who don't matter.
We all deserve encouragement, love, and acceptance from not only others, but ourselves, and that comes from knowing that our outer appearance--our size, our clothes, if we choose to put on makeup or not--should not deter from who we are as individuals, and what we have to offer the world. I just really wanted to remind all the women out there, myself included, that although we should take pride in how we look, and be confident in our bodies and whatnot, we are REAL women regardless of all of it. We should bring each other up, and remember that beauty isn't one universal look. Live your life with love: love for others and love for yourself.
I also filmed a video to accompany this post that can be viewed below:
Thank you to those who are reading this, and yay for my resurrected blog! Consider this a transition period, as I begin to delve into more personal, thoughtful posts, that will hopefully encourage, inspire, and entertain you all (I still have my impeccable sense of humour dontcha know!).
Have a great week (it's Saturday, so like, have a great weekend? But there's only one day left of the weekend...I don't know)!!!
Earlier this week, I did something I never thought I'd be able to do (at least not yet): I went out in public with no makeup on. Some people may think that's stupid, or that people who can't be fresh faced are conceited or whatever. But I, like many people, have acne scars, and they can be embarrassing. They made me feel uncomfortable showing my face for almost six years. However, a couple weeks ago, I did a chemical peel, which causes your old skin to peel off, and reveal clearer, new skin. And let me tell you, that was the most torturous week ever (It didn't hurt or anything, but I had to stay home for a week straight...talk about stir crazy!). Even though I did the peel, the scars were not completely faded, and my skin was nowhere close to being flawless (Beyoncé voice). Nevertheless, I applied my sunscreen, put on a baseball cap and sunglasses, mustered up courage, and headed out the door.
I had to wait 10 minutes before the bus came. This meant I had to stand there, outside, where someone I knew could see me and be alarmed at the sight of my face (everyone has only seen me with makeup on). But no one I knew showed up, and no one took particular interest in me or what I looked like. This went on for the rest of the journey. In fact, when I realized that people didn't really care about my appearance, I started gaining a little bit of confidence. I spoke to sales associates, stopped tugging so much on my cap...I even took my sunglasses off! After a while, I looked at this as an accomplishment. I had built up the courage to go out in public showing the real me!
This got me thinking about the people who have insecurities they can't hide, no matter how hard they try: a birth mark, an undesirable facial feature, or even their weight. I have a greater respect for these people. Everyday, they have to get out of bed and step into the public eye, being, or at least acting like they are comfortable in their own skin. Some people may decide to ignore them, or make fun of them because something they can't change. But they still have to live their lives and choose to be happy.
Sometimes it feels impossible to embrace our flaws, but even the most gorgeous person alive has his/her insecurities. Everyone has something they scrutinize in the bathroom mirror. And despite society's idea that we all have to look and have the same idea of "pretty" in order to be accepted, for the most part, people will accept you regardless of what you think is "ugly" or "unattractive" about yourself. There's no point stressing ourselves out, trying to look a certain way for people who will criticize or put us down anyway. I mean, we all want to look nice, be complimented, and receive "likes" on our photos, but getting "likes" on Instagram of Facebook isn't everything. What's most important is how we feel and who we are on the inside. That way, our internal confidence and positivity can radiate outward, impacting people's lives, rather than attempting to satisfy judgemental eyes.
I truly admire people who accept their imperfections. There is just something about someone who knows they are beautiful from the inside out, and that the people who know it too are the only ones worth their time. I guess the point of this long ramble is that although we are ALL beautiful, we ALL have something more to offer the world than physical beauty (and if you don't believe me, just listen to my bby J. Cole's song Crooked Smile).
I've never written a "personal" blog post, but I wanted to post something different this week. This is really long, probably reeeaally poorly written, and not everyone will agree or enjoy it, but there's no point in gaining a new perspective first-hand, if you can't share it with people who might be interested or impacted (also, the title has nothing to do with the actual blog post but wutevs).
I haven't written a post in a long time, as I've been busy making the transition back to going to school all week, instead of sitting and doing nothing all day during Christmas vacation. However, I have watched some good movies, an award show or two, and follow celebrity accounts on social media. By seeing these beautiful, talented, and rich men and women literally all over the place, it is only normal to be a tad jealous of famous people from time to time. But not I. You see, friends, not everything celebs experience should be envied; there are also some really annoying things that come with being famous. Nope, despite the seemingly amazing life these celebrities lead, I am extremely satisfied with my own. And here are just a few reasons why (Note: This post is for fun. I am not belittling acting or singing as a meaningful profession!)
1. I don't get special privileges on the train
I love that the hundreds of people that take the train every day don't show me mercy as we all try to get on the vehicle at the same time. It's every man or women for themselves, so any "gentle" or "accidental" shoving and elbowing that I experience in order to fight for a good seat is extremely normal. Why would I want to be able to get on the train first, eliminate conflict, and choose any seat I want, just because I was a famous actress or singer?? And if I was a famous person, I'd probably have to get a limo or a slick black car and ditch the train altogether. What a terrible thought... 2. I get to do my own hair and makeup
I only look decent about 2% of the time, but that's entirely by choice. I don't need a skilled professional to create trendy hairstyles and makeup product combinations so I would never have to worry about looking like a Sasquatch ever again. If I wanted to, I could totally whip up a gorgeous hair and makeup look that would be just as good and even better than any Hollywood artist. I just...choose not to...
3. I don't have to receive countless Twitter and Instagram notifications
The Kardashians each get hundreds to thousands of likes on their pictures every second and who wants that? I mean, all those people telling me how much they love me, how beautiful I am, and that they wish I'd be their friend; ugh it would be too overwhelming. I guess I'm just saying I don't think I could handle being showered with compliments 24/7. In fact, I'm happy with my 11 Instagram likes, ok?
4. I don't have to dress up to watch award shows
All the celebrities get dolled up in their gowns and suits for the Golden Globes, Oscars, Grammys--you name it. But what's watching these shows while wearing some elegant designer gown that accentuates my personally trained figure, compared to the luxury of laying in bed in my pajamas and stuffing my face with popcorn, chips and pizza? I know what your answer is. I'm sure as a talented celebrity it would be exciting to be in the presence of other stars, and take part in the live festivities. However, not everyone at these shows can win an award, and as far as I'm concerned, being snuggled up in bed always makes me a winner.
5. I won't have to get offended if a store clerk looks at me like I can't afford anything
Because chances are, I'll walk into the store, she'll look at me, I'll look back at her, a moment of silence will pass, and then we'll both laugh and laugh about how broke I am. As we wipe our tears, she'll escort me out and lock the door behind me. And that's okay, because I'll probably never intentionally surround myself with things more valuable than my net worth again.
6. I don't have to make my followers feel bad with updates on my fabulous life
I don't jet set to Bora Bora or Europe, I don't go to concerts or perform at concerts, and I don't know Leonardo DiCaprio personally. But can you imagine if I did? I would just make my followers feel bad that I was doing so many fantastic things, while all they could do is double-tap or retweet from their iPhones. And the last thing I want to do is make my followers uncomfortable or upset. This is obviously the main reason why I don't partake in such activities as taking private vacations and posting selfies with my movie star besties. Consider me doing you all a favour by not rubbing anything in your faces.
Why are you glad you're not famous?
*Be sure to click on the photos to find their original locations* Don't forget to check me out and follow me on Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest. Have a great weekend!
Ever dream about getting away? Going on an adventure? A place where you can say whatever you want, wear whatever you want, do whatever you want? Ever wish to be completely carefree? To be able to jump into a cab or on a train or a plane, and just go? Having no one to answer to?
What about meeting people who only know what you want them to know? Recreating yourself; getting a fresh start. Dressing up for a night out...or for no reason at all. Reading a book on a bench in the park, any park. Feeling warm sunbeams dance on your skin, or a cold breeze whisper against your cheeks. Eating meals you can't pronounce. Learning a language you never understood. Sleeping till noon. Shopping till sunset. Walking till dawn.
Do you desire an intimate relationship with life? This wild and daring and exciting and sad and beautiful life? Letting loose. Dancing. Being a free spirit, an inspiration to others. Choosing to be anonymous, or having the whole world know your name. All while never being afraid to express your opinion, to show emotion. Talking and listening. Being still. Never worrying. Falling in love, observing love, appreciating love. Growing in God, or growing in yourself. Growing in both. Taking chances. Learning from mistakes. Never looking back. Becoming alive again.
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